I think that's it. I've crossed the rubicon. I've declared my in profile that I will get no sleep until I get into Carnegie Mellon. I even stared at my Vice City imitation PSD and changed it to be a corny motivational poster. Carnegie Mellon University it says. And in place of Vice City, my secret project. I think I only told one person about that, but I guess we'll keep it that way.
If this is truly the way I want to live, then there has to be some major rearranging with the limited amount of time I have left. I know that the way I live my life now is inadequate to deal with the dreams of tomorrow. That is, the dreams are never seen.
I recently just changed my writing style to something way more produtive... It just makes more sense to me. And in pinning up the motivation CMU sign, I got one yellow pin and one red pin. So, to me, it's a sign. Really.
But then in the bathroom (where man contemplates life's greatest puzzles), I thought, you know, none of this matters, in the very, very end... As long as I feel good, then that's what really matters. And in the words of someone most meaningful to me... The giver of that which truly matters...
I feel alive.
Posted by Mark Canlas at April 12, 2004 01:42 AM